So it's been awhile since my last post. I guess lots has kind of gone on, and nothing has actually gone on. Busy doing a lot of nothing. As per usual. But one thing that has been going on is an Essay. 10-12 pages of My philosophy of leadership and My personal leadership styles and qualities within the context of Adventure Based programs. Well with no where to start, I've decided to take several tests and quizzes online that help identify my leadership styles. Learning really cool stuff! Not necessarily learning about myself, but learning how to embrace my style. I did a quiz on strengths a month or so back and that one definitely made a few things click.

My top 5 strengths, (k, so I was kind of surprised, but I know some of you reading won't be... I had just never thought of it....)

Spirituality, Sense of purpose, and Faith

Perspective (wisdom)

Citizenship, teamwork, and loyalty

Curiosity and interest in the world

Judgment, critical thinking, and open-mindedness

 

Those reading this and having read a few back, probably won't be surprised that Spirituality is #1 eh??? I'm not going to lie, I was. Mostly I'll admit, I never really thought of it as a strength. It makes sense, and as the description says... my beliefs shape my actions and are a source of comfort.

 

First test that I've taken today directed toward leadership... "Psychologist Kurt Lewin identified three major leadership styles." My leadership style

 

Participative Leadership

"Participative leaders accept input from one or more group members when making decisions and solving problems, but the leader retains the final say when choices are made."

 

Yup, pretty much the way I like to run things. As a leader, my job is to lead the people. If the people don't give me their opinions... how am I to know how to lead them? One of my pet peeves... people expecting me to make all the decisions without letting me know their thoughts. Now I understand why I get so annoyed when people just tell me to decide things. I will decide, but I want to know all the options, and I want to know what their opinion on the matter is.

 

2nd test...Your Leadership Legacy

Top 3 results...

 

Experienced Guide

Ambassador

People Mover

 

This one I found interesting. I guess I always viewed these three as leaders. I think the Experienced Guide is the one I've always viewed as a good leader, Someone very old and wrinkled, with the experience that comes with age. Someone that's always got the answers, and viewed as a wise old owl perched on a tree waiting to share wisdom with those who will listen. Well I'm certainly not old and wrinkled. But I'm not going to lie, I'm honoured to have received this as my top legacy. The description of this legacy is as follows: "Experienced Guides don't have to be old, or necessarily experienced. What they do have to have is an ability to listen, and to put themselves in others' shoes. They have a way of helping people think through their own problems; they are natural therapists." it continues but you get the point. anyways, with this new information I have that says I'm an Experienced Guide... I can't wait to be old, and look the part of the Experienced Guide! Gray hair and wrinkles... bring it on!

 

Anyways, I guess my point in all of this. People go through their whole lives trying to figure out who they are, what they enjoy and not understanding why people can't see it, or how as a leader they may go through trying to lead and not understanding why their followers don't listen.

I know you can do a million quizzes and it's not going to solve all those problems. You can't learn who you are through tests. Tests are sometimes inaccurate. (I hope the legacy one is at least mostly accurate I like being Experienced ;) ) But I would definitely encourage you to explore some of these tests. I'll put links for you to follow if you want to see some of your leadership styles. I find it's not the tests themselves that help you grow and learn about yourself... it's what you do with the results. The tests simply help you put into solid words who you are and how you operate. It helps you understand better your strengths, your weaknesses, and it helps you learn to build on your strengths, to embrace them. And to focus on how to work around your weaknesses by grabbing others strengths. That's the reason I believe God said "it is not good for man to be alone" Partly for companionship, partly to love. But also to learn from each other. He's given each of us strengths, and all He does is ask us to let Him build us to be even stronger. He places people in our lives to show us where we are weak, to show us where we are strong. And He puts people in our lives that we can learn from. To grab a hold of their strengths and either build our own, or learn to defeat our weakness. Taking these tests can also give us a list of other's strengths and styles, so we can understand them, but also so we can learn to look for the people in our lives that can help to build us. I'm not an advocate, or a creative builder, sometimes a truth-seeker. But because these aren't my styles, sometimes I forget I need the people who have these strengths. I say my way is right and yours is wrong. But by understanding the different styles, I can have a better idea of how to balance their way and my way in order to have an effective inter-dependent relationship that says lets do this our way. Because our way, usually works the best.

 

3 Leadership Styles

http://psychology.about.com/library/quiz/bl-leadershipquiz.htm

 

Strengths Test

(this one you need to set up an account, there's 2 strengths tests... a brief one, and a long one (VIA strengths). believe me... the long one is long... I didn't take the brief one but I hear it was more difficult to be accurate, but gave the same results. but... the long one is long... make sure you take it with no distractions... or have time to spare...

http://www.authentichappiness.sas.upenn.edu/Default.aspx

 

Leadership Legacy

http://www.yourleadershiplegacy.com/assessment.html

So, the other day I was sitting in class and something the teacher said sparked some thoughts, Well since I realized I was doing more thinking than listening I decided to pull out my journal and start writing. Sometimes I focus better when I can get the thoughts out in a physical and linear mode rather than trying to control my scattered thoughts and pay attention. So I'd like to share a bit of what I wrote with you guys, cause it was a mind blowing, humbling, and absolutely wonderful gift God gave to me.

How often do I actually focus on non-verbal??? Honestly... MIND BLOWN!!! Wow... I actually feel kind of like a jerk... My body language is probably more often than not... a sign of disinterest.. Not because I am... But usually it's just because I have bad focusing skills. (I have a habit of occupying myself with something while talking to someone, I focus better when my hands are busy and I can give them the attention they deserve. [teachers comments - Communication is 55% non-verbal, 38% tone of voice, 7% words themself] So although I personally know that I'm paying more attention... my non-verbals are very much communicating otherwise.) What would communication look like if I set my needs aside and worked to focus on others needs... Wow... I'm so incredibly selfish it's not even funny... (How many times do I expect people to cater to the way I am, when I can so easily work on making myself better so I don't spend more time explaining myself than I do listening...) .... How many times do I only listen to half of a request??? When I'm complaining about people repeating themselves... How many times is it because I haven't shown them I've heard... I say I've heard... but how much non-verble communicating has told them otherwise??? How many times have I actually heard??? 

I feel like I'm growing @ hyperspeed right now... Is it because I'm so far behind??? Or is it going to kill me because I am shifting from a focus on me to a complete focus on them? 

Lord, I am letting myself be selfish for a moment... why do I have to strive to such perfection??? (why do I have to be the one constantly making myself better, why can't they do more to help me out??? I feel like I'm the one doing all this work to cater to the rest of the world... Why can't we meet in the middle??? I feel like I'm always listening and not being listened to...)

Here was His reply...

Kimmy... I ask you because I love you. I want to to grow to be as me... Did I ever ask people to listen to me??? Yes, Did they listen??? No, they didn't. I preached and they did not listen... I asked them to stay with me... They fell asleep... I know it's not easy... Believe me. I know. But I'm asking you to put yourself truly aside... Trust me... I am here. When you need me I'll be there. Kimmy, when will you learn, I'm all you need. I know I seem to be asking alot of you. To put everyone else's needs first, to become completely selfless... But I am preparing you for something special. I am preparing you for a special work. There is such a need for selfless people... I call many, but few follow... Once you can learn to follow... I can show you others who have decided to follow. I want you to have the best... But I need you to be ready and deserving of it.. Kimmy, I love you so much Why is it so hard to see??? The closer you come, the more people to encourage and strengthen you I send... Why do you insist on holding on to what you aren't happy with when I'm taking you from content.. to fulfilled??? Do you trust me??? Are you ready to let go of trying to find fulfillment and let me fill you??? 
Kimmy??? 
Yes Lord??? 
Trust me... 

Wow... let me tell you guys... That hit me like a ton of bricks... Cause He's right... I spend so much time trying to make the here and now what I want it to be, that I won't let go and let Him lead me to a place where I belong. Since I decided to take this year for Him & I, let me tell you He's blowing my mind... It's hard because there's times I feel like I'm going through this incredible journey, a process, that is going to change my world completely... and when I look at where this could take me... it scares me, so much... Because who's going to be there when I'm done. But the truth is, it's a journey that never ends. And the more I trust in Him, the more support I find. I've gotten more emails from family then I've ever gotten before, and not just wimpy talks of "how are you?" "oh I'm good how are you???" like, real talks... The talks I've longed for. The more I reach out to Him, the more I'm willing to reach out to those around me for support. I am so blessed. I feel like I've come so far in these last few weeks then I've ever come in my life... And you know, He hasn't taken me out of my circumstances into better ones... He's made my circumstances better ones. My relationships with family and friends are stronger, more fulfilling. and no matter what... I know that if I keep trusting, if I keep moving forward... He's waiting there with more blessings to give me as I learn to care for them. They say God doesn't give us more than we can handle... I think that applies to blessings in a huge way. He can give us all the blessings He has... but if we aren't prepared for them, they end up as curses or worse yet... things that seem interesting but we don't appreciate them, they aren't a trial to learn from, and they aren't a blessing to help you grow... They just sit there in your life as extra junk to get in the way. Let me tell you, this is going to be an exciting year... If God keeps pushing me as much as He has in less than 1 month... God only knows how far I'll come in a year...

God Bless my friends <3